Looking ahead

Had my last day at the office today. Finally mentioned to more than one or two people what was going on. Everyone was lovely. On reflection, I probably should have told people earlier, but I wasn't really in a headspace to answer questions, mostly because I was still distancing myself from the fact that this was going to happen. It really wasn't til we started thinking that we were definitely going ahead, just a couple of weeks ago, that I started to look forward to this instead of trying to blot it out - possibly also due to the fact I've started to not be able to explain away feeling poorly to other reasons. It actually feels more worthwhile, like it will make a positive difference.

J also went for her chest x-ray and ecg today - thankfully it didn't take very long!

I've got acupuncture tomorrow - probably my last session before the surgery. I have got rid of the anxiety dreams and poor sleep, which is brilliant - hopefully a combination of the acupuncture, finally getting my decision and realising that half the reason I was waking up in the night was down purely to my useless kidneys overproducing poor quality pee (yeah, I was surprised too), rather than me being constantly woken purely by anxiety. They are lovely at the acupuncture place though, so that'll be nice to see them once more before the day.

Still petrified by the drug regime that's approaching - got to start taking immunosuppressants on Tuesday. 5 tablets, exactly 12 hour apart every day, from then until the kidney stops working. Apparently they (cyclosporin) stink, so most people advise that you take them out of their packaging a few minutes before you're due to take them so they don't make you feel rubbish.

Tomorrow is my last day working for a few months. That'll be weird.